We have been “we” a long time, you and me. Most days you are my favorite person of all time. But some days…some days, I can’t breathe because you have ripped me to shreds. This used to happen a lot more often. The first few heartbreaks were enormous and overwhelming. Then I learned not to trust you with the full depth of my love.
I was bitter, before…angry because I thought you would always be wonderful. And then I came to realize that sometimes you are, and sometimes you are not. So are we all – made up of wonderful and terrible, light and dark. Sometimes my own darkness and terribleness rip me to shreds (and others, too). I can’t hate you for being more terrible than I am myself.
But it still hurts. No matter how strong I think I am becoming, no matter how I think I have defended my heart, I am still fragile when it comes to you. The truth is…my heart is not mine to defend anymore; I gave it to you. I build walls around a shadow heart, while you hold the real one in your hands.
Don’t take advantage. Don’t press your luck. Your hold on my heart is slipping. My hands, with your heart, are getting tired, too. Everything is fragile, damaged at best. But I still love you. Don’t give up.