So, Friday started off pretty terribly. I had a parenting crisis and it started a whole crap spiral of stress, depression, and stress eating. I won’t go into the gory details because my kid deserves privacy, but by 8:30 Friday morning I was a hot mess.
I started the stress eating cycle with a “real” coffee…the kind that costs nearly $5 and comes loaded with syrups and whipped cream. That might have been redeemable, but I followed it up the rest of the weekend with pastas, bread, fries, chips, dip, brownies, cheesecake, hamburgers, hot dogs and every other imaginable food I should NOT BE EATING.
I figured, “What the hell? I already started the weekend off on a bad note, I might as well finish strong and unhealthy.” UGH.
Here I am today – ashamed, miserable, in pain, and realizing none of it was worth it. I know better ways to deal with stress and I should have used them. I made excuses. I could have (and should have): 1) prayed, 2) gone for a run, and/or 3) reached out to a friend. Instead, I fell into old coping devices and blamed my poor food choices on being busy, away from home, and at parties.
I am not going to beat myself up too much because I am still new to eating low carb & whole food for life. However, I am not going to call this weekend a “slip up,” either…it was very much a series of choices. I made the decision to put each and every item into my mouth and I could have made the right choices.
Today is a new day and I think it might even be a fasting day. I need a cleanse physically and spiritually. I will never be perfect, but I am not going to stop trying to be the best me I can be.